The GET Law: New York’s Approach to Religious Barriers to Remarriage

Divorce is complicated enough when you’re navigating property division, custody, and financial arrangements. But for couples in the Jewish faith, there’s an additional layer of complexity: the religious requirement of a “Get”—a Jewish bill of divorcement that’s religiously (though not civilly) required for remarriage.

New York recognizes this unique challenge. In fact, New York has gone further than most states in addressing situations where one spouse refuses to grant a Get, effectively holding the other spouse’s right to religious remarriage hostage. This is the subject of New York’s GET Law, codified in Domestic Relations Law (DRL) Section 253. Understanding this law is crucial if you’re a Jewish couple navigating divorce in New York, or if you’re facing the difficult situation where a spouse is refusing to grant a Get.

What Is a “Get” in Jewish Divorce?

Before we explore New York’s legal response, it’s important to understand what a Get is from both religious and practical perspectives.

In Jewish law (Halakha), a Get is a formal document—roughly equivalent to a bill of divorcement—that one spouse (typically the husband) grants to the other spouse (typically the wife) to effectuate a Jewish religious divorce. Critically, a Get is separate and distinct from a civil divorce decree issued by a court.

You can be civilly divorced under New York law without having a Get. However, according to Jewish law, if you’re Jewish and desire to remarry within the faith (or if you want your subsequent marriage to be recognized as valid by the Jewish community), you need a Get from your former spouse.

The Religious Significance

The Get is taken very seriously in Jewish communities. Without it, a Jewish person cannot remarry according to Jewish law. Remarrying without a Get is considered adultery under Jewish law, and any children from that second marriage are considered “mamzerim” (individuals of questionable legitimacy), which creates significant restrictions under Jewish law.

The Civil vs. Religious Distinction

This is where confusion often arises. In New York, a civil court can grant you a divorce. The state recognizes your legal right to remarry. But the Jewish faith has its own requirements for what it recognizes as a valid dissolution of marriage. These are two separate, parallel processes.

The Problem: Refused Gets

The tension emerges when one spouse refuses to grant a Get despite being civilly divorced. This creates an agonizing situation. One spouse is civilly divorced and legally free to remarry under New York law, yet that spouse cannot remarry according to Jewish law without a Get. The other spouse, by refusing to grant the Get, can prevent the first spouse from remarrying—indefinitely. This power imbalance affected countless couples and became a significant social problem in Jewish communities.

This became such a widespread problem that it captured the attention of New York legislators. In 1992, New York enacted what’s colloquially called the “GET Law” to address this issue.

DRL Section 253: New York’s GET Law

The Core Provision

New York Domestic Relations Law Section 253 states that:

“No court shall enter a final judgment of divorce unless it finds that, with respect to a marriage which requires a Get for the dissolution of the marriage according to the tenets of the Jewish faith, either:

1. Both parties have stipulated in writing that, regardless of how the court rules on all other issues in the proceeding, the party responsible for supplying the Get shall supply it within the time permitted by Jewish law after the entry of the final judgment of divorce; or

2. The court has determined that the laws of the faith require mutual consent for the Get or that the obtaining of the Get is impossible.”

Essentially, New York requires judges to ensure that civil divorce decrees don’t leave Jewish spouses trapped by religious divorce requirements.

How the GET Law Works in Practice

The Stipulation Approach

In most cases, the court will ask both parties to agree that whoever is responsible for providing the Get will do so after the civil divorce is finalized. This is the preferred approach and the one most commonly used.

If both parties agree to this stipulation, the judge will include it as a condition of the divorce. Once the civil divorce is finalized, the party responsible for the Get must comply. If they don’t, the other party can return to court to enforce the agreement.

When Mutual Consent Isn’t Required

In some cases, Jewish law doesn’t require mutual consent for a Get. If that’s the case—and if the court determines this based on expert testimony or judicial knowledge—the judge may issue the divorce without the spouse’s cooperation.

When the Get Is Impossible

If obtaining a Get is literally impossible (for example, if the spouse is deceased, or if the spouse is a minor and cannot legally execute a Get), the court may proceed without it.

Important Limitations of the GET Law

The GET Law is important, but it has significant limitations that couples should understand.

The Law Cannot Force a Get

While the GET Law can prevent a judge from issuing a final divorce decree without addressing the Get issue, it cannot actually force either party to grant a Get. The law essentially conditions the divorce on the parties’ agreement to comply with Jewish law’s requirements.

If a spouse refuses to sign the stipulation and the court determines that Jewish law requires mutual consent, the divorce may be held up indefinitely, or the case may be resolved through other negotiated terms.

Negotiating Power

Unfortunately, the GET Law can create a significant negotiating advantage for the spouse responsible for granting the Get. Some spouses leverage the Get requirement to extract favorable terms regarding property division, spousal maintenance, or custody. While the courts recognize this dynamic, they have limited ability to prevent it.

Enforcement Challenges

Even with a stipulation in place, enforcing a Get can be challenging. If the spouse refuses to comply after the divorce is finalized, the other spouse must return to court. The court can hold the non-compliant spouse in contempt, but it still cannot force them to personally execute a Get.

The Court’s Role in GET Disputes

Judges take GET requirements seriously and will often:

1. Ask direct questions about each party’s intent regarding the Get before entering a final judgment.

2. Require clear stipulations from both parties about who will provide the Get and when.

3. Consult Jewish law experts when there’s disagreement about whether Jewish law requires mutual consent.

4. Consider the Get issue as a factor in negotiating overall settlement terms. In some cases, judges will condition favorable terms (regarding property or maintenance) on a party’s agreement to provide a Get.

5. Enforce stipulations after divorce by holding non-compliant spouses in contempt of court, though this still doesn’t actually produce a Get.

What If You’re in a GET Dispute?

If you’re currently in a situation where a spouse is refusing to grant a Get:

Document Everything Keep records of all requests for the Get, any responses, and the timeline of events. This documentation becomes important if you need to return to court to enforce an agreement.

Consider Negotiation In many cases, negotiating the Get early in the divorce process, before all other issues are resolved, can prevent disputes later. Your attorney may recommend making the Get part of the overall settlement discussion.

Consult Religious Authorities In some cases, consulting with a rabbi or Jewish religious court (Beit Din) can help pressure a reluctant spouse to grant a Get. While these religious authorities lack legal enforcement power, they can exert moral and community pressure.

Understand Your Options Your attorney can explain whether your situation falls under DRL 253’s requirements, what stipulations are appropriate, and what enforcement mechanisms are available if a stipulation is violated.

GET Laws in Other States

It’s worth noting that New York’s approach is relatively progressive. While many states have enacted similar laws, others haven’t. If you’re considering remarriage outside of New York or if your spouse has moved to another state, be aware that the enforceability of GET-related agreements may differ.

The Broader Context: Religious Divorce Laws

The GET Law reflects a broader principle: the law recognizes that religious communities have their own requirements for valid marriage dissolution, and where possible, civil law should accommodate those requirements.

New York has similar protections for other faiths. For example, courts can consider whether Islamic law (Sharia) requires specific divorce procedures, and judges will work to accommodate those requirements where feasible.

Practical Takeaways

If you’re a Jewish couple contemplating divorce:

1. Address the Get early. Don’t wait until the end of your divorce proceedings to discuss it. It’s better to address it proactively as part of your overall settlement.

2. Get it in writing. Any agreement about the Get should be in a formal stipulation that the court can enforce.

3. Consult your rabbi. Understand the Jewish law requirements before you finalize your divorce.

4. Work with an attorney experienced in GET issues. Not all matrimonial attorneys are equally familiar with the GET Law and its implications.

The Bottom Line

New York’s GET Law represents a thoughtful attempt to balance civil divorce law with religious communities’ legitimate concerns about marriage dissolution. While the law cannot force anyone to grant a Get, it ensures that courts don’t finalize divorces without addressing the issue.

For Jewish couples navigating divorce, understanding the GET Law and addressing Get issues early in the process can prevent significant complications down the road. The key is recognizing that your civil divorce and your religious divorce, while distinct, are interconnected—and planning accordingly.

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Navigate Your Divorce with Experienced Counsel

At Neuhaus & Yacoob LLC, we understand the unique complexities that arise when religious requirements intersect with civil divorce law. Our team has extensive experience helping Jewish couples navigate GET issues and reach resolutions that honor both civil and religious requirements.

We serve couples throughout New York and New Jersey. Whether you’re pursuing an uncontested divorce, navigating GET disputes, or discussing prenuptial agreements, we’re here to guide you with both legal expertise and cultural sensitivity.

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